In the year 258 AD, Roman executioners expected screams of agony when they bound Lawrence, a defiant deacon of Rome, to a massive iron gridiron. They had kindled a slow-burning fire beneath him, designed to prolong his suffering by roasting him alive. Instead, they received one of the most legendary displays of dark humor in human history.
Lawrence’s wit was already well known. Days prior, when a greedy Roman prefect demanded he hand over the “hidden treasures of the Church,” Lawrence had gathered the city’s poor, crippled, and blind, presenting them to the official with the declaration, “These are the treasures of the Church!”
Infuriated by his defiance, the prefect ordered the gruesome execution. Yet, as the heat rose and the flesh burned, Lawrence remained entirely unbroken. Rather than begging for mercy, he leaned into the grim absurdity of his situation. Looking directly at his torturers, he famously quipped, “Turn me over, I’m done on this side!” Shortly before succumbing, he reportedly added a final culinary touch: “It’s cooked enough now, eat.”
By meeting the ultimate terror of a slow death with a sarcastic punchline, Lawrence stripped his executioners of their power. This final, defiant act of comedy transformed the gridiron from an instrument of shame into a symbol of triumph, ultimately earning him the title of the patron saint of both comedians and cooks.
Such was the content of a recent lecture delivered by the Worshipful Master W.Bro Stephen Gregory at Constitution Councils meeting on the 18th August 2026.
A visit by the Deputy Grand Prefect Trevor Parvin accompanied by a worthy attendance of district grand officers ensured the evenings meeting was a winner.
The WM proceeded with the business on the summons and welcomed the visiting officers and deputation. The highlight of the meeting was the lecture which entertained and surprised everyone with the level of humour displayed by St Lawrence at the time of his death. It was a real surprise to discover he was the patron saint of both Comedians and Cooks.
Our cook for the evening on the other hand was on his first outing and provided 25 diners with a pleasant fish dish of either Salmon or Sea Bass, both were well received. The evening was a big success with plenty of conversation regarding the District Grand Council meeting at Rochdale in September and the newly announced Grand Officer recipients for Octobers Grand Council visit to London.
Constitution Council is a small and welcoming bunch of Allied Masons and their meeting are always a joyous occasion. You can be assured of a enjoyable meeting when you pay a visit.
